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Last weekend I received a text from the one local friend who made the show that they were done and they were given their phones back. One month done already! Trust me, I have been thinking about them daily. Wondering. They still had to stay in LA for a week for promotional stuff, etc. How exciting! I then emailed another contestant I befriended. Of course out of curiosity I wanted to know if it was fun or as miserable as they made it out to possibly be. (Don’t worry, both people never said anything they were not supposed to) In fact, they now are able to talk fairly freely so that they can promote the show.

My local friend said is was “Sooooooo much fun”. Stab in my gut. The other friend responded that he could not understand their casting process and said I should have been on there. He said I would have been perfect. Stab in the gut again. So now I am feeling down again and “woe is me, why did I not get chosen” “I should be a superstar too!” All those feelings I had before that I could have had some fun changes in my life and shooting career came flooding back. I am reliving the on camera interview with the producers and what I should have said and not have said.

The show will start to air in June. Look for History Channel’s Top Shot. I am anxious to watch especially to support my pals. Although, I think each week will be torture for me. The selfish, vain side of me hopes the show portrays them horribly so I feel better that I did not get on. But I know that will not be the case. AND I don’t wish that upon my friends. I am so excited for my local friend. I have a feeling he did well.

The answer to the title question? BOTH. I am bummed and jealous. Another stab in my gut.

“Shoot Like A Girl! If You Can……..”

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